God Will Never Give Us More Than We Can Handle
A dear friend got me thinking about this verse yesterday:No temptation has seized you except what is common to man. And God is faithful; he will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. But when you are tempted, he will also provide a way out so that you can stand up under it. (I Cor. 10:13)
How I hear it all the time is: "God will never give us more than we can handle." I think that's where we run into trouble.
I'm not going to analyze the scripture today. I'm excited that I've learned how, or at least, how to start. But I just want to point out a couple of things. Paul wrote about temptation. And he never said it was from God, at least not in this text. All he was saying to the Corinthians was that God provides us a way...or a Way...to stand up to the temptation we will all encounter.
But as far as the stuff...the really rotten stuff...that is a normal part of life? I don't think this verse has anything to say about it. And I think interpreting it the way we often do is very dangerous. Here's why.
Let's be honest for a minute. Sometimes we get more than we can handle. Maybe this has never happened to you. I pray it never does. But it happens. Sometimes it's just...TOO...MUCH. That's where the church comes in. That's where community comes in, if we can put our pride away long enough to let people share our sorrow. And sharing it isn't going to make it go away, it's just going to mean we don't have to suffer alone. And make no mistake, God is not sitting back enjoying our suffering. He just reminds us that He knows what suffering is...maybe even better than we do.
But when we think that God will never give us more than we can handle...and then we go through times that are definitely...unquestionably...more than we can handle...well, it's perfectly natural to wonder about this God of ours? Was He lying? Are we not good enough for Him? Are we letting Him down by admitting that THIS is too much?? Or, hey, is He even really there at all? Here's a thought I know for a fact that good Christians have (and I say this because I have a GOOD friend...who is a GOOD Christian...and I'm pretty sure he thinks it): "I've always been taught that God would never give me more than I can handle. THIS is more than I can handle. It's either ME or HIM. Maybe it's HIM."
Sometimes life sucks. Sometimes it is loss after loss after loss. Every loss hurts. And sometimes there are too many. And sometimes just one is too much. We lose our jobs...our homes...our friends...our marriages...our minds...our children. Just thinking of those losses brings me incredible sadness, for I know someone who has lost each, sometimes even more than one. But there is a loss greater than any of these, the loss of faith. Watching a friend lose that...or feeling your own slip away...is the last thing any of us want to happen.
For now, for today, can we just all admit this one thing? Sometimes, some people will have more than they can handle. In those times, God has not lied. And He has not deserted us. He is there. And He will still be there when things start to get better, which they inevitably do. In the meantime, He has given us a few things to help.
He has given us Psalms of lament. Read them. Read them aloud. Scream them if you want to. God's children have been hurting for a very long time. And God has been there before, during, and after the hurt.
He has given us the church. There are people to lean on...people to cry with...people to help you do things that you just don't have the strength or will to do...people who share our faith and can give us a little of their own when ours wanes. Only pride keeps us from allowing them to help. Only the feeling that this is my pain and nobody else's. God has put us in community for a reason.
He has given us His Spirit. It's hard to be quiet in pain. But if we can be still for just a bit, we may hear the voice of God's Spirit, giving us assurance that it will end...and maybe even ideas of what to do in the meantime.
If you are going through a time when you have more than you can handle, I have four final pieces of advice. Remember how many people love you (chances are good I'm one of 'em...chances are 100% that God's one). Remember that it will end. See if you can summon something deep inside and go find someone to help. With anything. Just something that will get you out of yourself for a while.
And take an hour and a half and watch "Kung Fu Panda." I'm serious about that.
Hebrews 13:5 -- "God has said, 'Never will I leave you; never will I forsake you."
posted by Thurman8er @ 10:31 AM
15 Comments:
Oh, Steve, this is SO good. Thank you for saying what I often feel. Temptations do not come from God; Scripture tells us that. But we often do interpret this passage as meaning we won't be handed more than we can handle in life. And if we appear not to be "handling" it, others often think it means our faith is, as one person told me, "in the bottom of the boat." You and I have traded some e-mails, so you know a little of one of my greatest trials. I remember walking in the rain outside my office building one day all but screaming at the sky, "Why, Why, Why?" In that situation, the numbing grief has settled down to a quiet sadness. But there's another situation having to do with the health of my best friend and sister-by-choice. Very recently, her doctor prescribed new medication that seemed like our miracle. Then since, she's had some days of being as sick as she was two months ago. I went to church Sunday morning alone because she was sick. Sunday night when she was unable to go (I'm between church services now), and I went out the door in tears asking God if this was some kind of cruel joke to let us think she was going to get well.
I desperately NEEDED your post today. Thank you. (Sorry for the length of the comment.)
I love 1 Cor 10:13. Give me hope when I'm struggling with sin. There is ALWAYS a way out.
Thanks for the reminder!
Good points. People want to use that verse as nice feel-good spirituality, but it doesn't really fit. Especially when you see it in the light of other verses like 2 Cor 1:8 where Paul says "we were under great pressure, far beyond our ability to endure..."
Thanks Steve, This is good stuff. I'm traveling through one of the toughest times in my whole life right now. I need that church family to encourage. I get it some from my own church family, but more often than not, it's people like you whom I've never met that seems to understand more than the people I'm "closest" to. strange how that works.
Thanks to Meowmix who turned me on to this blog. She is a true angel for the Lord.
I like how you wrestle with this. This verse is definitely about temptation - not what life dumps on our lap. The idea that God gives us never more than we can handle is a lie - again, this is verse about temptation... not what we face in life.
What He does promise is that whatever we face we can overcome the temptations within those moments with Him. And that's the key - in all things He can work good for those who love Him.
thanks, Steve
Good thoughts - especially the practical advice.
There are times when I almost want to slap the "God will never give you more than you can handle" people and then say, "Oh yeah, what about that?"
Good thoughts Bro. BTW - If the above were true, why would we need other people or the church?
I've seen people's faith all but destroyed by a misunderstanding of this verse. Good thoughts...
It's song that comes to mind -
"Change My Heart, O God"
Sometimes, it's a process - this change - where God reveals more to us, thereby making "change" and resisting temptation easier. I know all too well...
WOW!! Give it up... Scriptures all over the bible give us the comfort we need "knowing" that God doesn't give us more than we can handle. Just because it doesn't say it, doesn't mean it isn't there. Try Psalms!! Stop trying to be a Genius and make the bible "yours" it's God's word!! Study it further and "listen" to GOD!! His WORD will endure forever!!
I don't know you personally, but each and everything you wrote in the blog is highly inspirational. It fills us with a power of optimism and hope. It's not just your thinking, but also the way you wrote is excellent.
Very rightly said, the pride feeling that it's my pain and only i can solve the problem is the attitude which stops people from getting help. I am surprised by the way you interpret it all, god gives a community for reason. Yes. I found this part as the best.
And Kungfu Panda rocks..:D
Thank you for uploading such inspiration writing available for everyone to read.
I am not a christian. A friend of mine is, who once told me in depression dat god will never giv us more than we can handle.
Hello sir. I am a college boy from India. I have just finished a book on teen depression and social support, a fiction novel. In my comment above, i have expressed my deep appreciation for your work. I was wondering if there is any i could attach your blog to my book, with your name of course, as a part of extra features? Because I believe many deserve to know that community is for a reason, I don't find much people around myself knowing this. They keep letting themselves suffering alone. I shall be waiting for your response, please reply back. sidstyle1691@gmail.com
I am paraplegic, my body is deteriorating, I wear diapers and I am in constant pain.... sorry but God is giving me more than I can handle. I am losing the battle and I feel as if He had set me up for failure. My life is hell on earth and if He had any mercy, He would call me home, out of this hell on earth.
Church is part of the problem. Mostly a bunch of pharisaical, holier than thou horse's asses. Church is the last place you should go for help when you have more than you can bear, unless you want to be used for other people to feel 'good' about themselves. I know what you'll say. I need to go to another church. I've been to churches in community after community, denomination after denomination, state after state. They're all the same. Jesus rebuked such people.
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